she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
