I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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