it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize
