I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
