i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Randomize