Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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