puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
