Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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