So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize