the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
