I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
