I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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