I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
