I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize