I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
