I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
