How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
