I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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