i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
