When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
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