that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
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