Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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