we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize