What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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