..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
