why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
