So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize