this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
