You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I have post one night stand depression
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