I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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