girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
