So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Randomize
