a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
So here I am, sexting at work.
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