I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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