thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
