your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
