The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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