Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
