I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.