just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
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