I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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