mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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