I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I would ride that face into the sunset