hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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