Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I understand Curling. That high.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
