So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
