I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Couch. On fire.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
