she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize