We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
