nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
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Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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